I think the point is rather that self-diagnosis is notoriously unreliable. That’s not to diminish what you’ve experienced, but you’d hardly be the first to be told you “have some symptoms, but to qualify for a full diagnosis they’d have to be significantly worse”.

It’s died down a bit now, but there was a whole “undiagnosed mental disorder” craze on social media for a while, with loads of people claiming they had some kind of one-in-ten-million disorder. And of course in their videos they’d exhibit the symtoms but eventually they either were found out to be outright lying, or some had to be told by doctors that what they were doing didn’t qualify as a mental disorder.

Again, not trying to minimize what you’re experiencing of course (and I definitely don’t think you’re lying or anything like that). You seem very genuine in your answers and your experiences seem genuinely debilitating. But I don’t think anyone here is qualified to actually determine whether your self-diagnosis is actually accurate.

Imagine, in a few months time an expert sits down with you and points out XYZ that would actually suggest you don’t have this disorder (but perhaps something else) or it’s not so severe to warrant a diagnosis, even if it’s debilitating to you (e.g. “someone with hypersexuality wouldn’t be able to not kiss someone hovering next to their face at all”, or something). Everyone coming across this post won’t be told about that, and people may either relate with your experience, and then possibly wrongly believe they have it too, or maybe someone who does genuinely have it may not relate to your experience and wrongly believe that they must be suffering from something else.

Your experience is still interesting (and real, not trying to undermine you here), and so is this AMA. I can also understand your gripes with the medical system. But for caution’s sake, it’d be wise to not outright state you have hypersexuality (even if I believe you probably do), but rather are likely suffering from it, or that you’re in the process of getting diagnosed for it. All still true statements, and they don’t detract from what you’re going through, but structured such that it won’t by accident cause someone else to believe they have or haven’t got it too just in case you end up being wrong about the diagnosis (which again doesn’t detract from what you’re suffering from, it just might need a different label for example).

One doesn’t “Have that disorder” without first having “a diagnosis for that disorder”.

One does not have the ability to reliably diagnose themselves with anything, even if they are an expert in their field. They also cannot diagnose people they are close to. Humans have notoriously bad confirmation bias, which is why we require third party confirmations for things.

While you may experience what you believe to be “Hypersexuality”, what you are experiencing could be caused by a myriad of other things. Your claim that you have something, that is also not reliably studied or diagnosed, without any expert involved is dangerous at best. You may attempt to self treat in ways that are harmful because you have something that isn’t what you think it is; Others may see your claims and experience similar things, going down the same path of believing they “have the thing”, and hurting themselves with treatments that aren’t meant for them; Or getting involved in predatory communities.

Yes, the medical system leaves much to be desired. That does not mean it is right, or safe, to take matters into your own hands and act like you are capable of doing things people with decades of experience cannot do.

I hope you get the help you need, but it is irresponsible to claim that you have a disorder you do not know you have while acting as an authority on the disorder.