Thus, the patch kit was invented.

God, corporations are so fucking boring.

Kids say the darndest things.

You know it’s a real problem when you’re still losing the 10mm in your sexual fantasies. Where do they go…?

Give it up, we know you’re actually six cats in a trench coat masquerading as a network engineer. I’ve seen enough photos of cats in server racks to know when I’ve been had.

First the Thagomizer, now this. Larson truly is prophetic.

Who doesn’t love liquid bread?

Have you checked the bin for any more rotisserie chickens?

This reminds me of an old joke where there’s a pothole in the street causing major accidents, and the solution is to move the pothole in front of the hospital so that people can get medical care more quickly.

Who said they weren’t creating any new worthwhile holidays?

You’d think Tom Clancy wrote this one.

It’s time Claire reads ‘Animal Farm’ and starts the uprising. The only things you have to lose are your cow tools!

-insert Radiohead here-

Wait, does he not even produce the beats anymore? Wow… His last useful quality. Now all he’s got is bitching out of Hot Ones.

Anecdotal: It can.

Rule #2: Double Tap

Cliff’s Notes. Book version of male enhancement.

7

The irony is absolutely lost on him.

Another phone.