I’ve tried the serenity prayer without god and I’m reading the subtle art of not giving a f*ck, but it’s not enough. The book is good though.

There are still moments when people really piss me off and while I’d like that not to affect me, my first instinct is still to feel anger and to hate the jackass making my life or work difficult. Sometimes I’d like to punch him in the face.

It could be the plumber who doesn’t come on the agreed day, the technician who ‘repaired’ a tv set, only to have the same issue the next day, a coworker who keeps yelling when I’m trying to work and even after asking him not to be loud, blatantly ignores me or coworkers who importunate me with stupid questions about my weekend.

A strategy I’m going to use now at the workplace is to ignore every non related job question from these people and only answer when they ask something job related. As for the plumber, the hate usually subsides after 2 days, but I’d like to be more resilient, not to jump to anger and hate so easily.

It’s like I’m emotionally very easy to trigger.

I don’t know if you agree with this sentence: A person who yells does it because he doesn’t have power to modify a situation to his advantage, because he is powerless.

This is how I feel sometimes.

  • Glide@lemmy.ca
    71·
    3 days ago

    Cynicism is horrible. It is slowly training your brain to always assume the worst in everything and everyone, and has little to do with expectations. Cynicism legitimizes the anger you already feel, and makes it “okay” to yell about it, rather than taking control of your emotions.

    You need a philosophy that allows you to take control, not one that justifies your helplessness. Mindfulness practices, and/or existentialist thought eventually leading to positive nihilism can help you.

    Edit: After rereading your initial post, I am doubling down on mindfulness practices. The goal of simply not caring doesn’t seem to be helping you, so perhaps it’s best to try and accept and understand your feelings for what they are, rather than attempt to reject them. Your anger is there, and it is real, but it is your choice to act on it, or let it pass. With time, the practice of “letting it pass” will hopefully result in this being the default position. The brain form habits, and if you start to build a habit of letting go, it’ll get easier.